In Freud’s view, a human is driven towards tension reduction, in order to reduce feelings of anxiety. Most of what we fear primarily involves distortions or false perceptions shaping situations that do not present a threat to your survival.
Anxiety is an aversive inner state that people seek to avoid or escape. We do everything humanly possible to avoid feeling paralyzed by fear and anxiety through defense mechanisms – some healthy and some maladaptive – but tension reduction is the overall goal. When gripped by fear and anxiety, our ability to think rationally is swept away. Thoughts race, our heartbeats like a drum, we visibly tremble, we perspire uncontrollably, and we gasp for air. It feels like everything is falling apart.
I’ve been prone to low levels of anxiety throughout my life, but several years ago I had a full-blown panic attack because my marriage was going south and I was in the midst of managing an investment property. If I didn’t qualify for a re-finance, I could lose my property. As a therapist, I have had my fair share of anxiety but, the series of events happening in my life at that time took me out of my comfort zone and introduced me to a new landscape of anxiety symptoms.
As the weeks continued, I became agitated. This was my anxiety. My heart was beating; my thoughts were racing as I thought of the worst-case scenario – losing my home, my marriage, being homeless and the list goes on … and down the rabbit hole I went. Most of all, I had an impending feeling of doom. Long story short, the stress and threat of loss made me feel that I would disintegrate. I mean that quite literally — fall into pieces and cease to exist. The anxiety symptoms developed because I felt a very real threat to my existence. As the days went on, I was able to put the pieces of my mind back together and gauge a sense of reality that I would be okay.
Fear, Anxiety, and Disintegration
When we are engulfed by uncontrollable or unpredictable events that threaten to destroy our sense of security or sense of self, we must also deal with feelings of desperation, impending doom, and disintegration. A psychological term referring to the existential awareness of the “nothingness” of death, disintegration occurs when you have lost control of strong emotions like fear and anxiety.
Disintegrating in the face of perceived dangers happens when that ancient instinct for survival (the brain’s limbic system) overwhelms your newer, rational-thinking cerebral cortex. Disintegration causes your thoughts to race incoherently. Inevitably, the thought that most captures your attention when seized by fear impels you to act irrationally and is usually against your own interests.
Controlling Anxiety by Overcoming the Fear of Disintegration
What causes anxiety for one person may not cause anxiety for another. This is because most non-instinctual fears are learned responses to perceived dangers. In many cases, you can trace your fears and anxieties back to past experiences.
Take a moment and think about the most emotionally difficult or psychologically stressful experience in your life. They will most likely involve a profound and/or unexpected change, or loss of someone close or traumatic accident. For many of us, change related to work or a new city can trigger intense anxiety or panic attacks. Have you ever experienced something similar?
Exposure to emotionally overwhelming experiences can make you feel terrified that you’ll disintegrate under psychological pressure. The more fragile your sense of self, the less it will take to stir up these feelings and anxiety symptoms. For some people, the threat of any kind of intense emotion can set off panic attacks.
Being fearful of dangers we cannot control contributes to your survival. But allowing yourself to feel fear and anxiety over things you can control does not contribute to your survival. Don’t be afraid to examine your fears.
